Trust in Me by Lori Toland

Author:Lori Toland [Toland, Lori]
Language: nld
Format: epub, pdf
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter Six

Jamie looked like I had slapped him. “Tristan,

please.”

“I wasn’t drunk,” I shouted. I toned it down when I

saw the stricken look on his face. “I drank half a beer.

How the hell could I have been drunk?” I watched his

face change as he put two and two together, and I gritted

my teeth in frustration. “Is that why you left? Really?”

He was silent, and I sat down on the bed because

my knees were shaking. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, his

eyes clouded with pain.

I knew the anguish he felt, because I had carried

around my bitterness for years too, but I didn’t care

about that. “Get out,” I said through clenched teeth. It

was going to be a long drive back home tomorrow and a

long few days the week after at my parents’ house, where

I’d have to smile through the pain of my shredded heart.

I didn’t think it could get any worse, but when

Jamie looked into my eyes, I could see he was crushed. I

still cared about him, and as much as I wished I didn’t

give a shit, I couldn’t take back my heart, lost to him on

that summer night. “I’ve spent ten years thinking about

what I did wrong to make you leave. Let me go, Jamie.”

I saw him jerk as if he was going to leave, but in

that second, something changed. He stared at me, seeing

deep into my soul. “You thought about me? You didn’t

hate me?”

I cringed, realizing I had given myself away. “You

were my first. Of course I thought about you.” Of course I

didn’t hate you. I loved you from the first moment I saw

you.

“I felt awful, thinking I had hurt you,” he said.

I didn’t doubt his words, but still the pain and

confusion ached inside me. “Why didn’t you ever call

me?”

“I thought you hated me.”

I could see the remorse in his eyes, and I felt

terrible for his believing he had taken advantage of me—

for one tiny little second. I knew there had to be

something besides just that. “You’re an idiot,” I told him

baldly.

“Great. Just great. You’re an asshole,” he said

angrily as he turned to leave.

“So you’re leaving again.” I crossed my arms. “Good

going, there, golden boy. Can’t stop running away from

the truth.”

My words stopped him, and the glare I got

reminded me of a hurt puppy’s, angry because of the

pain, but not understanding why it was hurting, and

lashing out at me. “You asked me to leave,” he said

sharply. “Figure out what you want.”

“Tell me the real reason you left that morning.”

“I did,” he said quietly.

“If that’s the reason, then I wasted ten years of my

life wishing I could have woken up next to you. It means

you’re a dick for leaving me in the lurch the morning

after to clean up your mess,” I snarled.

The anger in his eyes shattered my heart, but I

didn’t believe for one second he was actually mad at me.

His self-loathing had eaten him up from the inside, and if

nothing else came of this night, I was at least glad he

could have some peace. “I told myself that was the reason

I couldn’t contact you.

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